What would you do?
by FlamingReaper
Summary: After four years of not seeing each other, Roger and Doug spot each other again. The only difference, things have changed for Doug, his sister Judy, and his friend Skeeter. Not raunchy, but has adult themes. Its a song fic and the song is "What would you do?" By City High


Doug honestly didn't know how his life came to this, but it did. Though he couldn't blame anyone but himself. And probably Patty, who had been the one who messed up one day and got hooked on heroin. Doug felt for her, he did, but he had other things to worry about right at this moment, namely their four year old son. Doug bit his bottom lip, thinking about his little boy who hadn't stopped asking where 'mommy' was. Doug honestly didn't know what to tell his boy, he really didn't. He'd gone over and over it with both Skeeter and Judy on how to explain why Patty was gone, they couldn't help him either.

Several loud whistles and joyful shrieks brought him out of his reverie and Doug let out a sad sigh before he started rocking his hips a little dirtier as he finally stripped down to his barely there undergarments and ass less chaps. The party that he and five other stripper had been hired for was a mixed guest party, meaning males and females. The strip club that Doug had started working at, because Patty racked up their credit cards and stripping got him a large amount of money in a short amount of time, was mostly female oriented. There were males that worked there, Doug being proof of that, women were just more in demand then men. It was an honest job, and Doug really liked his coworkers, and the Madame, it just wasn't what he'd been picturing for himself. It helped that both Skeeter and Judy worked at the bar, mostly so they could make sure nothing happened to Doug, though they had different shifts because of Doug's son. On nights all three of them worked, Doug had a very trusted neighbor, who had three kids herself, watch his little Logan. Surprisingly, she understood what Doug and his little ragtag family were going through, having a drug addicted ex-husband herself.

Doug let loose a soft sigh as he scanned the room of hooting men and women, dissatisfied with everything in his life. The young man froze a moment, however, when he locked eyes with someone from his past. The past that he had been trying to forget for the past years. Doug went back to dancing, needing to finish his set before having a complete and utter panic attack. Roger, the one who he had locked eyes with, watched Doug until he was finished before going up to him to talk. He hadn't seen Funnie since they were nineteen, when the poor brown haired boy had been with Patty.

"Hey Funnie, I didn't expect to find you here, doin' shit like this for a living," Roger said somewhat snidely as he helped doug off the table. He didn't knock the stripping profession, his mom actually used to do that a lot when he was younger to help put food on the table.

"Neither did I Roger," Doug replied with a shrug. It felt kinda good to talk to Roger, even if the circumstances sucked.

"Come on Funnie, I wanna talk, but without all of the goddamn noise," Roger said loudly. Doug nodded his head and followed the red head to the roof, which was just a quick jaunt up the fire escape to the floor above. As soon as they got up there, Doug shivered somewhat violently as a cold breeze blew across the barren roof. Roger was kind enough to drape his thick leather jacket over Doug's thin shoulders. Doug looked up at the punky red head startled, not used to such acts of kindness from him. He smiled a second later, happy with the gesture, regardless of it coming from his old school bully.

"Thanks Roger, really," Doug replied, wrapping the leather jacket around tightly around himself, trying to get as much warmth as possible.

"It's no problem for an old friend, Funnie. So, you wanna explain what the hell your doin' with all this strippin' shit?" Roger asked as he pulled out a pack of all natural cigarettes. Doug looked over at the city before answering his former bully. The only reason he did was because Roger and him had actually become pretty good friends in the last year and half of high-school.

"I, I couldn't quite find a job that would have appeased my diploma, though I am certified to be teaching both english and art, neither of them pay enough to help pay the large bills need to be dealt with, Roger," Doug replied, not really looking at the larger man.

"There's other jobs out there Funnie, ones that'd pay just fine, especially if you're a teacher," Roger replied before taking a drag from his cig.

"Kinda hard to find a job that would be flexible and pay enough for me to feed and shelter my four year old," Doug replied stoically, though he finally looked Roger in the eyes. Roger looked at the smaller man in shock before taking another kit from his lit cig.

"No shit? You have a kid? Me too, a three year old little girl," Roger replied excitedly. All of the red head's current friends didn't have any kids, neither did any of the ones that came from Bluffington. Well, at least not yet anyway.

"Mine's a little boy, his name is Logan. He's the only thing that really keeps going, especially on really bad days," Doug said with a warm smile. Doug always whore the warmest of smiles when he was discussing his little boy. Roger smiled back, understanding where Doug was coming from, though most parents did.

"So, what 'bout his mama? You and her married? Though I can't see any women bein' happy 'bout her man gettin' nekkid fer stranger. I wouldn't be happy in that situation either, tho' I understand if you need the money from it," Roger said easily. The red head gave Doug a blank stare when he younger man tensed from his question.

"She, she isn't in the picture anymore. I don't think she could take the pressure of being a young mom and trying to finish up college, her thing took longer then mine. I don't know what really happened though, cause one day she tried drinking and when that stopped working, she tried shooting up heroin. She's been in and out of jail for the last three years," Doug replied honestly. Roger winced as he took a drag from his cig.

"Damn, Funnie, and I thought my little Tina's ma was a total bitch, geeze, that blows," Roger replied. Doug wanted to argue, but he really couldn't, knowing his old friend was right. Roger took several long drags from his cigarette, trying to calm his inner rage. He had always liked Funnie, even when he was harassing him and that hadn't changed in the years of their separation. Doug nodded once before turning his gaze back to the city lights. He'd forgotten how easy it was to talk to Roger, who had always been a sort of comfort to the brown haired man, even when they weren't friends.

"She hadn't always been like that Roger, but she did take things too far. Hell, she even tried to get custody of Logan last year, tried saying that stripping was a horrible influence. The judge took one look at her file and put a restraining order on her, and saying that at least I was trying to be a good parent. Apparently her mom did the same thing to put her through school," Doug finally replied after a few moments of silence.

"Feh, people like her always take it too far, and then try to ruin it for everyone else," Roger said with a one armed shrug.

"Yeah," Doug replied easily. Both stood in silence for a good long while before Roger decided to break it.

"I got a proposition for ya Funnie," Roger said, startling Doug ever so slightly.

"And what would this proposition be, Roger?" Doug asked, one brown eyebrow raised.

"How about you come live with me and be my kids nanny? I get good bank because of the job I do, which is monster truck driving, so I can pay ya.

All's you'd have to do is watch my kid, cook and clean," Roger said easily.

"W-why would you offer that? And why would I take it?" Doug asked, stuttering slightly.

"Cause yer down on your luck, you have a kid, and its better then a bunch 'o' assholes callin' ya a slut," Roger replied.

"You have several excellent points. Is it possible for me to think about it for a while?" Doug asked with a playful grin.

"Sure, Funnie, as soon as I get a pen and paper, we'll exchange information," Roger replied with a playful grin of his own.

"All right," Doug replied, his grin widening. Rogers grin widened as well before they both started laughing at each other's ridiculous grins. Their friendship had always been about pranks and laughter, it made them both feel good when they could still laugh at random times together. They quieted down a few minutes later, still grinning like loons.

"So, do your parents know about your son?" Roger asked after several minutes and instantly regretted it. The look on Doug's face made him a little panicked.

"No, Judy and I ran away after my parents divorced. Mom had become so busy with her 'save the world' campaign, that she stopped noticing that me and Judy. Though we prefer that over the cruel monster my father turned in to. You know, he actually tried rape Judy days before we left?" Doug replied with an angry shrug. Roger could only stare in shock at his long time friend, not expecting such a nice person like Mr. Funnie to actually be that much of a bastard.

"Well, shit, Funnie, I didn't know you were planning on winning the 'my life is shittier contest'. Sucks to be you then. So, when did you actually have your son?" Roger asked, changing the awkward subject. Doug looked thankful that he did. In the all the years of knowing each other, Doug had gotten used to Rogers rude randomness.

"I was eighteen when his mother told me she was pregnant. She wanted to get an abortion, but I begged her not too. I've been taking care of Logan since. So, what about your daughter?" Doug replied evenly.

"That sucks complete ass, Funnie. I had a one night stand with one of crazy stalker fans. The dumb bitch left Tina on my door step with barely any protection with her birth certificate and everything," Roger replied and Doug winced in sympathy.

"Only a little bit, Klotz. Sounds like your life sucks too," Doug replied with a shake of his head.

"Just a tad, Funnie, just a tad. Well, Funnie, I hate to cut this short, but I gotta go, I gotta get back to Tina," Roger said with a slightly saddened grin. Doug nodded at his companion and followed the other man into the building, knowing they still had to exchange information. As soon as that was done, Roger left and Doug finished his shift. When the party was over, around two-thirty, the group of strippers returned the place of work to go home. The brown haired man groaned as he followed his work mates into their shared dressing room. All of them were exhausted and cranky, and wanting to get home. The group of strippers, which were considered the best of the best, tended to stick together, especially after such parties when everyone was drunk, no one knew who would be followed. Not everyone in the group got along with each other, but they all trusted each other better then the others in the joint. Doug was still considered a newbie, even after two years, however he was the newbie that was just good enough to get into the elite group at the Dancing Dove.

Doug let out a weary sigh as he sat next to one of his best friends, Rita, in front of one of the make up mirrors. The big breasted mexican women threw him a tired look before turning back to the large make up mirror to get ride of the glittery makeup on her face.

"How yoo' doin' Miho?" Rita asked somewhat softly. Her husky voice riddled with an obvious spanish accent.

"Devastatingly tired, but sorta awake. You?" Doug asked, just as softly. Rita had been his 'big stripper sister' when he first came to the Dancing Dove, so he could learn all the ropes.

"Same as usually Miho, tired, but jittery. So, who was that handsome man that stole your time earlier Miho?" Rita asked as she stripped out of her button up shirt. Doug blushed deeply, which Rita noticed, before responding.

"He's an old school friend, Roger, that I had lost contact with a while ago. We were both surprised to see each other," Doug replied as he stripped out of his own outfit. The elite didn't have problems getting naked in front of each other, had no problems touching or prodding, especially if it came from their group. It was kinda like a gang, once you were in, you were in for life.

"You really like don't you, Miho?" Rita asked as she took off the rest of her uniform. Doug blushed again, but automatically helped Rita get her bra and panties on before pulling on his own boxer-briefs.

"Yeah I do," Doug replied, unable to lie to her. No one at the Dancing Dove could, which was why so manny dancers came to her for advice.

"Tell him that Miho, he seems to like you too," Rita replied. The young women was in the same situation as Doug, though she also had a string of bad boyfriends that went along with it. Doug nodded to her before finishing getting dressed and leaving. As he left, he said goodbye to his workmates, all of them glad to be going home. As soon as Doug did get home, he brushed his teeth and barely managed to get into his pajama pants before he passed out on the couch. He lived in a very cheap three bedroom apartment with Skeeter, Judy and Logan. Doug and Logan usually shared a room, hover, Doug didn't want to risk waking his boy up.

It was two weeks later, when Doug finally took Roger up on his offer. To be honest though, Doug actually had help making his decision. During a particularly tiring set, Doug ended up getting assaulted with a beer bottle. Luckily enough for the young dad, the bottle didn't hit his head and only managed to get him in the leg. It caused Doug to stumble and his music to stop out of shock. Doug squinted into his audience to see where the bottle came from, so he could point it out to the bouncers and froze when he saw it was Patty. She looked pissed of and completely destroyed due to her drug and alcohol use. The too skinny blond glared at her ex fiance in complete hate, though she didn't quit remember what she hated him for, only that she did. Doug turned from her before pointing her out for the bouncers. It wasn't the first time Patty had come to interrupt Doug's dancing, and it probably wouldn't be the last. Patty was forcibly removed from the establishment, just like normal. Skeeter and Judy, who had been there that night, on a shift, came to him immediately to see if he was okay. All three of them went to the back while another dancer got on stage.

"Are you okay Doug?" Skeeter asked in worry while Judy got a first aid kit and an ice pack.

"Dude, I need a better job," Doug muttered out, slumping in his seat while Judy took out glass and cleaned up his cuts.

"Of course dear brother, you always do," Judy replied solemnly. She still hadn't fully recovered from what their father did, but she was better then she had been.

"I already got an offer, just need to call him," Doug replied. Both Skeeter and Judy froze before they glanced at Doug in shock.

"W-what would you be doing?" Skeeter asked in shock.

"I'd be his nanny," Doug replied, cracking his neck.

"When did you get this offer?" Judy asked.

"Two weeks ago," Doug replied.

"WHAT!?" They both exclaimed in shock.

"Why didn't you take it before?" Skeeter asked in shock.

"I didn't want to leave you two," Doug replied, looking down.

"Leave?" Judy asked.

"Yeah, I'd be a live in nanny," Doug replied.

"Oh," Judy said.

"Yeah," Doug said.

"Hey man, what if he hired all of us? If his house is big enough, we could be the gardener and the maid and stuff," Skeeter said with a grin.

"Okay, I'll ask him," Doug said with a grin. The brown haired youth called Roger the next day to get everything set up. Roger thought about it for a moment before agreeing to having two extra workers around the house. It wasn't like he didn't have the space or the money for it. As soon as the red head had made it big, both with monster trucking, and, surprisingly, paid vehicle demolition, he had gotten a decently large house for him, his mother, and his daughter. It wasn't like he wanted to live with mom, but she had a stroke from all the bad food and cigarettes she had eaten in her life, so she needed help. Her left arm was completely useless and she needed help around. Having a women actually in the house to help her would make both Roger and his mom, Sheila, feel better.

"Okay Funnie, see you four soon," Roger said.

"Thanks a lot Roger, really," Doug replied with a happy sigh.

"No problem Funnie, are you sure that they don't mind movin' in?" Roger asked.

"If you saw the shit hole we lived in, you wouldn't question that. Plus, they know your a good person," Doug said easily.

"All right, Funnie, I believe ya," Roger said with a grunt.

"Oh, by the way, not to get creepy Roger, but I really like you too," Doug said with a mischievous chuckle. Roger froze for only a moment before responding.

"Just so you know, your my women now," Roger stated bluntly.

"I know," Doug said with a joyful laugh. Yeah, things began to become a lot better for the four family members that had struggled, but luckily, they were heading the right way.


End file.
